SixEQUJfive (1997)

by Dandruff!!

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about

Our sincerest thanks go out to Marco Roelofs of Windmill Records and Jos Haijer of TopHole Records, for allowing us to make these two albums available for download.

Dandruff!! lived from 1991 to 1998

Dandruff!! was:

Mark Tilstra - guitar & vocals
Jan Heddema - (solo) guitar, left in 1995
John Krol - (solo)guitar 1996 to 1998
Edwin Pot - bass
Peter Millenaar - bass (substitute during 1992, when Edwin broke his thumb)
Mark Regeling - drums
Tuppus - vocals

credits

released January 8, 1997

© 1997 Dandruff!! / Windmill Records / EANVP
WM 00297

Recorded, mixed and produced by Frank Reijgersberg at Huize Beatrix, Hoogeveen, The Netherlands, 1997

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Dandruff!! Groningen, Netherlands

Dandruff! has stopped in 1998.
Check out our bio at the Poparchief Groningen.

Both Marks have stopped making music; John and Tuppus went on to start De Fuckups, Edwin records and produces their records, on Jan's old equipment.

Jan became the best producer and sound engineer Groningen ever had, but his illness got the better of him and he took his life in 2002. We all still miss him.
... more

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Track Name: Gobbledegook
GOBBLEDEGOOK - DANDRUFF!!
"No, Donny, these men are nihilists, there's nothing to be afraid of."
Lyrics by Tuppus

I don't want to be a suckling
I don't want to be mature
I don't want to be too vague
I don't want to be too sure
I don't want to be a loner
I don't want to get involved
I don't want no solutions
I want all my problems solved

I don't want to, I don't want to

I don't want to have no choice
I don't want to have free will
I don't want to be a no one
nor on top of the bill
I don't want to talk in riddles
gobblegobbledegook
I don't want to be illiterate
I don't want to write a book
Track Name: Disorganized
DISORGANIZED - DANDRUFF!!
A day in life, lyrics by Tuppus

Now I wanna be a good boy (sic)
although I see that it's a little late
to get things done, to right the wrong
the rent is due, the phonebill too...

There's a bill collector at the door again,
so I'm hiding on the floor, but then
I might as well just let him in
'cause I really have to start to
get organized (get organized)
get organized (get organized)
get organized (get organized) get organized

Send me some money dear mommy dear pop,
or I'll have to go out on the streets and rob
some poor old lady's handbag and then
I might end up in the can


Got my head stuck in my ass again
And I really gotta make a rescue plan
gotta pull myself together
and I really have to stop being
disorganized (disorganized)
disorganized (disorganized)
disorganized (disorganized) disorganized

Every morning I wake up I sweat
and I realise where I've been;
I've been to the desert, I searched the horizon;
I wait for my ship to come in...

get organized
Track Name: The Wrong Side Of The Tracks
THE WRONG SIDE OF THE TRACKS - DANDRUFF!!
Lyrics by Tuppus, who is afraid of small villages

It feels like sunday, but it's not.
I'm sweating. I don't feel so hot.
Maybe the world came to an end.
( Agoraphobia sets in ).

All is quiet on the countryside.
The sky is huge. The land is wide.
I guess this is considered pretty.
I should have never left the city.

And I just stand there, struck with fear.
Because there's nothing way out here.
There's only silence, farms and sheds.
What if I need some cigarettes?

The street is empty. There's not a sound.
And no one seems to be around.
( But then the curtains, they all move somehow. )
I'm on the wrong side of the track.
I feel their eyes burn in my back.

Everything is scary about this town.
It's like a graveyard upside down.
And every house is like a tomb.
With crucifixes in every room.
Track Name: The Old Fart Speaks
THE OLD FART SPEAKS - DANDRUFF!!
Gerontopunk can't keep up with the times. Lyrics by Tuppus

You've got your 40 dollar Stussy cap.
And your crotch between your knees.
There must be some kind of generation gap.
Because I just think you look like dweebs.

You all want me to act like a maniac on stage.
Well, I ate ten refuccioles. So no way!

I ain't never going to ride a skateboard.

You've never heard of Johnny Moped,
or Slaughter and the Dogs.
Because he's a hard loving man,
and they've got Boston Babies.
You've never heard Darby Crash sing 'Snap, Crackle, Pop'.
Man, you haven't even heard of the world famous Crabs.

You're too old...

The pants are too baggy and the t-shirts are too wide.
And the caps are too expensive.
The bones are too brittle and the balance is too weak.
And the shakes are too intensive.

Do I look like the kind of guy you would see riding on a skateboard
No, didn't think so.
Track Name: Budd Dwyer Show
BUDD DWYER SHOW - DANDRUFF!!
Arse thonga, vita brevis Lyrics by Tuppus

I am a slug upon an icecube, on a hot summer day
in the middle of a salt lake
A spec of dirt on the carpet of a neurotic housewife
A house of cards in an earthquake
I am a tiny piece of styrofoam in a bath full of glue
I am a wrinkle in Cher’s face

I’m dead meat, a goner
I’m wormbait, a stiff
for all I know I have only seconds to live
It’s curtains, I’m wasted
I’m through, I’m on deathrow
I am the star of the Budd Dwyer Show

A piece of meat within the reach of a famished Rowser
I am the bad guy in a Rambo movie
I am a secret told to the people at the Transparant Club
A four letter word on the BBC
I am the husband of a black widow spider. and I just got laid!
A saxophone solo in a Dandruff!! Song

I am a slug upon an icecube, on a hot summer day
in the middle of a salt lake
A spec of dirt on the carpet of a hosophobic housewife
A house of cards in an earthquake
I am a frog in the hands of a boy
I've got a straw up my ass
I'm a pice of nylon in the fireplace


I’m a star
and you ain’t.



I am a slug upon an icecube
on a hot summer day
I am a secret told
I am a husband. Bald.
Track Name: At The Producer's Desk
AT THE PRODUCER'S DESK - DANDRUFF!!
about the church of daytime television. Lyrics by Tuppus

Sex with hamsters on the net.
A mum with triple octuplets.
An amputated acrobat.
A dog that knows the alphabet.
A moonie marriage divorcee.
A nun charged with blasphemy
An expert on embroiderie.

A transsexual quarterback.
A famous chef turned maniac.
Who keeps his wife au bain marie.
A five year old with a PhD.

A naked man says he's an heir,
to colonel Parker's dancing bear.
So he could be a millionaire.
And buy some proper underwear, to hide his shaky pelvis.

A whole platoon of the infantry,
diagnosed with pregnancy.
A narcoleptic hypnotist.
A humoristic calvinist.

You can pick up your letter of indulgence, at the producer's desk.

A bum who gets a new outfit.
And finds himself in deep shit.
Because begging doesn't work that good,
in an Armani suit.

An embryo from Tokyo that won a karaoke show.
Men with schlongs in their pants,
the size of an elephant's.
Who sue their surgeons because they used exploding silicone implants.

Now, on the air from coast to coast:
The canonization by the pope,
of your talkshow host.
Track Name: Robert Mitchum's Belly
ROBERT MITCHUM'S BELLY - DANDRUFF!!
Navel gazing. Lyrics by Tuppus

five plates spinning on a pole, man!
You see; no one gets sacked. This is a great circus act!
The shows on, it shows off, it shows that
I'm stuck with them and they're stuck with me.

Big black hat!

I had a hat so small it was hurting my head.
I was uncertain and said:"lower that curtain of lead"

It's ten sizes too big, but then again I've never seen one with such a tight fit!
Like a boegie rolled into a ball and shot into the air

A cardboard box in a damp place:
you try to lift it-
oh, and then the bottom falls off.
Bottoms up! I can't keep it dry.
To look inside the box you need an open lid.

Brian Wilson for God, man!
If you don't like to pop, you got to not show up.
The shows on, it shows off, it shows that
I'm sticking with them and you're stuck with us.

Robert Mitchum's belly...
Track Name: Lullabies Lie (Crabs cover)
credits
Track Name: Hyberpunk
HYBERPUNK - DANDRUFF!!
"Sometimes the best solution is just to sit and do nothing"
Mr. Natural (Robert Crumb)

Lyrics by Tuppus

Fat ass sitting in an easy chair.
I'm getting comfy, I'm going to go everywhere.
Inertia is safe and action is menacing.
I think this seat is going to burst a spring.

I've gone to sleep on a bag of peas.
I've made up my mind and I've put it into deep freeze.
I close my eyes: it's all inside.
My information highway is like a roller coaster ride.

Everything I do is wasted time's a line and I've erased it.
Leaving just one dot that moves around.
Blissfulness is boredom's brother.
Want and need are father and mother.
One son's always gone, the other is nowhere to be found.

I've got the whole world in my head.
And all the books that I've never read.
I'm a homey in a coma, with a head full of soma.
Travel in the comfort of your home.

When I leave I turn off the lights.
I need a drink. Yeah, allright!
The blinds are shut. The phoneline is cut.
Hyberpunk has got me stuck in a rut.
Track Name: The Donkey And The Carrot
THE DONKEY AND THE CARROT - DANDRUFF!!
This was a drawing first, now it's just confusing. Lyrics by Tuppus


A man is walking backwards through a storm.
He's got a white stick in his hands.
He sees about a million things flying through the air, and where they land.
He can only see what he has passed before, but he would really like to see some more.
So he wildly waves his stick behind him, into the storm's downpour.

There's a carrot and the donkey is not too far away.
Why don't you come and get it? Get it?
You're halfways.

He's analyzing history, while trying to see the future with his blind man's stick.
And just when he thinks he's getting somewhere, he feels the sudden blow of a falling brick.

So the donkey comes to a sudden stop because he sees the carrot before him has gone.
You see; when the donkey has got the carrot, that donkey sees no sense in moving on.
Track Name: Turf
TURF - DANDRUFF!!
A song about saxophones, true love and a broken nose
Lyrics by Tuppus

You know he told me that he worked in a zoo once,
and now I wonder if he actually *worked* there;
he’s marking his territory,
sees everything in black and white.
Chihuahua dog is getting ready for a fight!
But he doesn’t notice
that he’s biting his own tail.

He’s biting his own tail
he sees everything in black and white

I hear he’s running all over town now,
showing everyone his bloody tail who wants to see
swearing he’ll get even with whoever bit him
he’s gonna mess him up!
And I must say that he’s doing a swell job!
He just didn’t notice
that he was biting his own tail

Chihuahua dog was a bit confused you see;
he thought he was walking his owner.
He was biting at the leash
but she wasn’t holding on to it no more
she walked right off his turf
and now he can’t find her…
‘cause he’s a one-dog pack now
Track Name: Porcelain
PORCELAIN - DANDRUFF!!
About words, and where pork swords go.
Lyrics by Tuppus

I like dictionaries. I like thesauruses too.
I've got a stack about five feet high here in my room
I've got 26 languages right there on my shelf
I keep on buying them for myself,

because they're
zarphographical, thermoneutical, monolactical, urolingual, subdilactable, highly fractable, permionical, neurostatical, pyronautical, meganormable,obstentational, on the whole they're all very practical books.

I've got Afghan, African, Greek, American, Melanesian and a Zulu one too.
Hebrew lexicons, and a latin one, and a Finnish one too.

Let your mind do the walking,
let your fingers do the talking

P.O.R.C.E.L.A.I.N.
Porcelain.
Track Name: Throw a Fit
THROW A FIT - DANDRUFF!!
Zen and the art of opening cans
Lyrics by Tuppus


Nothing in the fridge but a can of tuna
with a metal key to strip the lid
I turn it around; it breaks out
and now I'm gonna throw a fit

I'm a jerk, nothing works, I go berserk
Throw a fit!
It's nothing new, I ain't got a clue, what can I do?
Throw a fit!

It's my fate. It's just my kind of luck
All I can do is De Fuckups*
I'm so uptight. I keep it bottled up inside.
Up to a certain fight

Tuna can still closed tight
I can't find a can opener
Whenever I need one -god I hate it-
it seems to have been disintegrated

I've seen it done in war movies
They open a can, it looks so smooth
With mouth or screwdriver
But I cut my hand and broke my tooth
Track Name: Spontaneous Combustion
SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION - DANDRUFF!!
getting in touch with your inner introvert
Lyrics by Tuppus

Extinguish the fire, go back to sleep
Make sure there's no light shining in too deep
Smouldering fires give lots of fog
Look like a human, think like a dog

My burning glass senses, my ears and my eyes
might pick up your thoughts and then alter their size
Enlightened ideas, pushed into my face
might reach the fire and set it ablaze

So I'm not going to listen to you.
I'm not going to hear a word you say.
It doesn't make sense anyway.
Track Name: Excuse Me For Not Cleaning Out The Shower Drain
EXCUSE ME FOR NOT CLEANING OUT THE SHOWER DRAIN - DANDRUFF!!
The prequel to the song 'Slut' by Sexy Dex
Lyrics (and lead vocals) by Mark Tilstra

I know I did something that's terrible to you
Everyday I blame myself fotr what I did to you
You thought you knew me through and through
but what I did to you is unforgiveable, what can I say?

Don't give me the silent treatment
I'd rather have you kill me right here and now
Don't give me the silent treatment
çause I still love you baby
And I think you've got to understand.
Let us try again.

Try now, try harder, try as hard as you can
I have always loved and that's hard to understand
I'll try to make it up to you, one day you will forget
the things that stood between us in the past
Track Name: Invasion Of The Geeks
INVASION OF THE GEEKS - DANDRUFF!!
About people who care more about the records than the music on it
Lyrics by Tuppus

There's an invasion of the geeks in punkrock city # 1
and they're marching down the streets terrifying everyone
with shirts and shorts and legs that never saw the sun
They're so frightfully normal all the punks are on the run
The geek shall inherit the world, armageddon's begun
There's an invasion of the geeks in punkrock city # 1

Everybody starts to scream as the four-eyed monsters come
chins back, teeth out, hairdo's done by mom
The sound of sandals on the street make a threatening drone
They're chasing away every mohawk, every Sid-clone
They've got blackheads, zits and boils all over their face
They've come to rule the world and dominate the human race

There's an invasion of the geeks in punkrock city # 1